


Eres

by adamngoodbatch (sibbed)



Category: 9-1-1 (TV)
Genre: Also puppies, Declarations Of Love, Idiots in Love, Love Confessions, M/M, Pre-Relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-30
Updated: 2020-05-13
Packaged: 2021-01-13 06:29:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 7,203
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21239684
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sibbed/pseuds/adamngoodbatch
Summary: Prompt: i’m not a good writer but I need to read eddie telling buck how he feels in spanish at random moments (for example, buck does some dumb but adorable thing and eddie is all like “no puedo creer que estoy enamorado de ti” or “eres un idiota, pero me gustaría que fueras mi idiota”) and buck being ??? until he has a brilliant idea and writes what eddie said into the google translator (with some spelling mistakes bc come on the guy doesn’t know spanish) and he’s like oh. OH. OH SO THAT’S WHAT HE MEANT





	1. Oye

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first fic for this fandom and my first fic in like 7 years. So be patient with me. Unbeta'd.  
I've been kidnapped by buddie and I can't get out.  
Also, puppies and Buddie, so...

The team checked every room twice and they didn’t find a soul in there. They were sure the house was empty.

Suddenly, Eddie heard some high-pitched whining coming from the last room of the house, behind the garage, it looked more like a closet than a room and he peaked inside for one last time. His heart stopped the moment he saw them, 4 puppies inside a box all squished together and whining non-stop. Who could keep these cute little babies in here? And how did they miss this before? He called out to Buck and pointed at the puppies.

“Oh no, poor babies, we need to get them out” Buck rushed into the room and at that exact moment a wall collapsed right in front of Eddie blocking his way to the tiny room Buck was now trapped in.

“Buck!” Eddie tried to radio him. The entire structure seemed about to collapse completely over him.

“Buckley, Diaz, get out. Get out now!” Bobby yelled through the radio.

“Negative, Cap. Buck is trapped inside,” Eddie paused and sighed “With the puppies.”

“What are you talking about, Diaz? You need to get out. The building is going to collapse. Where the hell is Buck?” Bobby was getting inpatient. It was more than fine that they tried to save every living thing, but not if they were minutes away from dying under the collapsing structure themselves.

“There’s this room behind the garage, it has a tiny window, maybe you can try and get him out from there?”

“Ok, we’ll check, but I need you out of there right now Diaz!”

“Yes, Cap.”

The fire threatened to consume everything on his way out of the house. Eddie lost track of time for a bit, lost in thought about Buck and the puppies. Those goddamned adorable puppies. 

When he reached the front door and finally stepped outside, he looked around searching for Bobby. Not being able to even see straight and feeling dizzy he sat down for a second on the grass while Chimney checked on him. He didn’t talk at all and Eddie started to get suspicious.

“Chim, where’s Buck?” The awaited answer never came. “He’s still inside, right?” Chimney nodded and Eddie started desperately radioing Buck.

“Buck, Buck, do you copy?”

Silence.

“Evan, please, answer me”

Silence.

“Evan, if you are there, please, just say something… Anything”

The fire was receding, but the whole house had started to crackle and squeak. Those were the noises a building made right before collapsing in on itself. Eddie lost himself in thought. He wasn’t paying attention to anything going on around him. He only heard those noises and assumed the worst. The litany of thoughts that invaded his mind had him convinced that this was the end.

_He's gone. He's gone. He left me again. He's gone._

“Clear the front lawn, this house is about to go down, we’re ok here.” Bobby breathed through the radio.

Chimney helped Eddie up and took him to sit by the truck. “Eddie, Cap is just in the backyard with Hen helping Buck, it’s ok. It’s going to be ok.”

Ignoring Chimney's words, he picked up the radio once more, “Please, Evan… just answer.”

Hen was coming with two very small puppies in her hands. She gave one to Eddie took the other with her. Right behind her, Bobby came strutting with a third puppy. No sign of Buck, Eddie was feeling dizzy and confused, his vision was still blurry and his eyes were itchy. He started petting the puppy and felt a few tears fall from his eyes. “We just got him back, this can’t be… it cannot…”

He felt a hand patting his shoulder and he turned around blinking rapidly to adjust his vision. The sun dazzled him and made worse what the smoke had started.

Another puppy was delivered on his lap.

“I’m ok, Eds. I got the puppies out that ridiculous window while Bobby and Hen made a hole for me to crawl out of. I was never in real danger, really. Also, those walls were thin as fuck. That so-called room must have been a new addition from the owners. It's ridiculous how someone could...” Eddie heard Buck was talking but he couldn't listen to what the hell he was saying.

Eddie blinked. He opened his mouth and then closed it again. Buck kept talking and talking. That was the exhilarating part of surviving a collapsing anything. He got high on it. Eddie knew what it felt like, but right now, he couldn’t process anything. His only thought was _Buck’s alive, Buck’s alive, Buck’s alive._

“¿Como puedes hacer esto? ¿Acaso no piensas Evan? You don’t… you don’t think. You just do. ¡No puedes no contestar la radio! You are supposed to answer when I… when we call!” He stood up and turned on him. _Buck’s alive, Buck’s alive, Buck’s alive. Breathe, Eddie, just breathe._

“I was getting the puppies out the window and I couldn’t, my hands where otherwise occupied with puppies, Eddie, come on, calm down”

“Esta es la cuarta vez…” He trailed off, “¿Sabes qué? I don’t care. You are reckless…” Eddie lowered his head, defeated, disappointed. _Buck’s alive, Buck’s alive, Buck’s alive._

“But the puppies, look at the puppies Eddie! They are all ok thanks to me!” Buck smiled all teeth and pride. Eddie shook his head and a thin almost imperceptible smile appeared on his face. Buck was being one smug bastard and he knew it. _Buck’s alive, Buck’s alive, Buck’s alive._

“Ay, Buck, eres un idiota” Eddie patted Buck's shoulder.

Buck squinted his eyes and smirked. "Hmm?"

"I'm glad you're ok." Eddie was so tired and didn't want to deal with Buck's attitude so he turned around and whispered, “Ojalá fueras mi idiota.”


	2. Sanar

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “I had dogs since I can remember. I love them, but since my last dog passed and I moved out of my parents’ house, I never found the opportunity to adopt one.” Eddie missed having a pet. “Actually, come to think of it, it’s been like more than 15 years since I had my last dog with me.”  
“That’s like half your life, Eds.”  
“Yeah, right? But I always thought that it would be good for Chris, eventually.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This took a turn to Angstyland that I didn't expect. Buck is not having the greatest time of his life. Eddie would love to change that.  
I promise we'll be back to Flufftown next chapter.

When Hen saw that the puppies were alright, she put them in a box that one of the neighbors kindly gave them. After they finished with the disaster of the house that burned almost to the ground, they picked the box and took it with them on the truck.

Laika, Huan, Balto and Toto were four very adorable puppies. During the ride to the vet to get them checked out, Buck decided to name them since the owners surrendered them. He was heart-broken that he had to take them to a shelter, but he also knew he was in no condition to foster and even less adopt puppies since he almost couldn’t even take care of himself. Eddie, on the other hand, was seriously considering adopting one of them. He always thought it was a good idea to give Chris a companion. And if this idea made Buck happy too then maybe it was worth it.

“I’d love to adopt them all, you know?” Buck was trying to keep the puppies calmed and inside of the box. “I always loved dogs, but never got to have one. My parents weren’t the type.”

“I had dogs since I can remember. I love them, but since my last dog passed and I moved out of my parents’ house, I never found the opportunity to adopt one.” Eddie missed having a pet. “Actually, come to think of it, it’s been like more than 15 years since I had my last dog with me.”

“That’s like half your life, Eds.”

“Yeah, right? But I always thought that it would be good for Chris, eventually.”

Buck got distracted by the puppies and the conversation fell.

“Tan adorable.” Eddie stared at Buck. He had this look on his face, like it was Christmas or something.

\---

Once the vet cleared the puppies, the receptionist told them they had a foster available, someone they trusted, and there was no need to take them to the shelter. They left the puppies at the vet and Eddie left his number with the receptionist asking if they could give his information out to the foster.

A few days later, while at the firehouse Eddie received a message from an unknown number.

**Unknown number**

**Hey, I’m Paige. The vet gave me ur number. Told me to update you about Laika, Huan, Balto and Toto. I got them 4 days ago. They’re doing wonderful. Such cute little puppies. They seem to be like 6 weeks old, so in a few weeks we gonna put them up for adoption.**

** _Eddie_ **

** _Hey I’m Eddie. one of the firefighters that took the puppies to the vet. I’m glad they are doing ok… you kept their names?! my friend will be thrilled._ **

**Paige**

**Hell yeah I loved them. Huan specially. Such a nerd whoever named them**

** _Eddie_ **

** _*confused*_ **

**Paige**

**HUAN THE HOUND OF VALINOR? THE SILMARILLION? TOLKIEN! **

** _Eddie_ **

** _No idea_ **

**Paige**

**Yeah, such a nerdy name. I love it.**

** _Eddie_ **

** _I’m thinking of adopting one of the puppies. I have a son and he’d be so happy to have a dog. Also I would be so happy to finally adopt a dog._ **

**Paige**

**Hhahaha dude yeah no problema, that’s awesome. Dogs are magical. Wanna come see them this weekend? Sunday morning would be best, but if you need to come over on sat we could arrange it.**

** _Eddie_ **

** _Yeah! Sunday’s fine._ **

** **

\---

“Hey, Buck!” Eddie called out from upstairs. Buck was cleaning the truck with Hen, “I have a surprise for you…”

“What?”

“I have a surprise! What are you doing this Sunday at… let’s say 10 am?”

Buck peaked his head from behind the truck and looked at Eddie with a very confused expression. “I was planning on catching up with some… sleeping, but why? Where do you want to go?”

“Es una sorpresa. Ya verás. You’ll see on Sunday. Just wear comfortable clothes. It’s quite the ride.”

\---

Sunday 10 am couldn’t get there faster. They both had the day off and Eddie was a ball of anxiety. He had arranged that he’d picked Buck up and take him to see his surprise while Chris stayed with his bisabuela.

The trip to visit to the puppies took them over two hours in a very silent car. “You really don’t want to spill the beans, right?” Buck was glancing at Eddie.

“Mmhmmm.” Eddie was biting his tongue. It was awkward and uncomfortable for both of them. He noticed Buck connected his phone and put some music on. This was ridiculous. Why was it so difficult to keep his cool. They’re just puppies. Puppies and Buck. That had to be sweet.

They arrived at some suburban house in the outskirts of the city, Buck still wondering what was going on. He smiled at Eddie wide and gentle, “Ok. Are you going to tell me where the hell are we or nah?”

“Be patient, Buck, please. It’s just a nice surprise. Trust me.” Eddie opened the door of his car and got out, signaling Buck to follow him. He rang the bell and a blonde woman wearing a t-shirt that said ‘Protect all animals. At. All. Costs.’ answered the door. Buck chuckled as he came to the realization of where he was. He’d been asking Eddie for updates for the puppies almost every two hours since they left them at the vet and he’d told him that he hadn’t had any news yet and maybe he should call the vet, but never got around to do it.

“Hey, Eddie, right?” Paige stretched her right hand out for Eddie to shake.

“Yeah, I’m Eddie, and this is Evan, the nerd one that named them.” Eddie whispered and turned to look at Buck who was standing rigid looking as confused as he’d ever been.

“Hi… I’m Buck, yeah … I mean… Evan.” He shook her hand and stared at Eddie with bewildered eye. “Eds, she’s the one that has the puppies? And you lied to me?”

“Yes, I lied. I just wanted to surprise you, ok? Perdóname la vida.”

“It’s ok… I just…” Buck had been anxious about the puppies. He’d been thinking about them non-stop. Imagining bringing them home and sleeping with them and feeding them and bathing them. But he knew he couldn’t. Because he never left his house anymore if it wasn’t for work so why would he submit some puppies to the torture of being confined in a tiny apartment. Eddie could see Buck’s thoughts spinning and trapping him in his own head.

“Hey!” Eddie grabbed Bucks wrist gently. “Remember how I told you I wanted to adopt one? We’re here to choose which of them is a better fit for Chris.”

“Really?” Buck looked as if he was about to start crying and Eddie’s heart skipped a beat.

“Yes, really.”

Paige started walking towards a gate beside the house and asked them to come in. The backyard looked spacious and there was a wide playpen set right in the middle with the four puppies playing inside. Buck hurried to the fence and stared at Paige.

“You can go in, you know?” she said, jumping the fence herself and sitting beside one of the puppies. “The hound of Valinor has the black collar”, she said winking at Buck, “Balto is this one, the red one, Laika the yellow one and Toto, the green one.” She’d placed four distinct collars to each of them to be able to tell them apart quickly.

Eddie followed her inside and picked Huan up. “Pero que cosa más adorable… Miralos, son tan tiernos. Quiero llenarlos de besos. How could the owners just surrender them like that? ¡No lo entiendo!” Eddie was scratching Huan’s head while Balto and Toto ran around playing with the toys Paige was throwing at them and Laika was lazily thrown over a blanket. “Pobrecitos… their house did burn down though.”

Once Eddie was settled, Buck decided to step carefully inside the pen. He looked overwhelmed and Eddie smiled at him. “Do you think he’d be a good pick for Chris? He seems calmer than those two. What a name you chose… Laika would be a good fit too, I think. Some people say that female dogs are better with kids.” At the mention of its name, Laika stood up and moved closer to Eddie, laying her head on his lap.

Buck grabbed a squeaky toy and offered it to Huan. “Who’s a good boy?” He threw the toy and Huan went trotting to catch it, bringing it back to Buck who was now sitting next to Eddie. “Thanks, man. I needed this. Like, a lot.”

“No problem. Te mereces el mundo entero.” Eddie picked up Laika and kissed her snout. “Entonces, ¿que piensas, querida Laika? ¿Quieres venir a casa con nosotros?” Buck was staring at him while absent-mindedly still throwing the squeaky toy for Huan who grabbed the toy and started to nibble at it.

“Have you consider getting Chris a service dog?” Buck questioned him, still playing with Huan and not really looking at him.

“Not really, no.”

Paige interrupted the conversation. “Chris is your son, right? I don’t want to meddle but why’d he need a service dog? Oh my god, that sounded so rude. I used to train service dogs. In fact, my ex husband still has our training facility. So maybe I can help?”

“Oh, my son has CP. Mostly he has some mobility issues. He’s had a rough year too. And he’s dealing with some kind of PTSD, but he’s been managing it quite well with therapy. The nightmares are almost gone. I never even considered the possibility of a service dog for him. His school would allow it. So maybe…” Eddie started to feel hopeful. He thought Buck had had a great idea and looked at him, trying to thank him but he noticed he wasn’t really paying any attention to the conversation, being distracted petting Huan, most definitely getting lost inside that head of his.

Suddenly he was brought back to the conversation because Paige was talking. “And then when the vet called me, he said they had some puppies that seemed to be a lab or golden retriever mix. So maybe they are trainable, it looks like Laika and Huan most definitely would be, but it’s up to you if you want to try with a puppy or you prefer to go with an already trained dog. Those are both attainable possibilities. Maybe it’d be easier with an already trained one. I can contact you with….” Paige looked really invested in helping Eddie. Buck was now staring at them and Eddie felt a pang of guilt inside of his chest, but he couldn’t place where it was coming from.

Laika was timidly wagging her tail and giving small little kisses to Eddie’s face. “Gracias, amor, gracias por los besos.” Eddie chuckled, “I think she wants me to pick her. But first maybe I’d like to bring my son to meet her before we take her home. Is it ok if we drop by next weekend?” He set the puppy down on the grass and stood up, leaving the pen. Buck was still sitting with Huan on his lap and he looked like he had disconnected again.

“Yeah, of course. I’ll start trying her and see if she’d be a good fit for training.”

“Thanks”, he answered and ran his fingers through Buck’s hair, “Evan, we should be going if we want to get back in time.”

“M’kay” Buck muttered.

They arranged for Eddie and Chris to visit Laika next Sunday and Buck decided to tag along.

When they got in the car after saying their goodbyes to the puppies and Paige, Buck opened his mouth and closed it again. Eddie raised his eyebrow at him and asked him softly, “What is it?”

Buck opened and closed his mouth again and sighed. “I’d love to adopt Huan, you know? I’ve been thinking about it since the day we rescued them. I know I’ve been a mess; I don’t even know what to do with myself if I’m not at work or with Chris. Or you. My apartment is pure chaos. I never want to do anything. My life is mayhem. I don’t think I’m healthy enough to take care of another living breathing being every hour of every day of my life, you know?” He groaned and rested his head on the window of the car.

Eddie patted Buck’s leg. “Si, lo sé.” After a few minutes he noticed Buck was snoring gently, mouth slightly parted.

“I know. Tu corazón va a sanar. Y me encantaría poder hacerte feliz de alguna manera.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Translation time!
> 
> “Tan adorable.” - So adorable.
> 
> “Es una sorpresa. Ya verás.” - It's a surprise. You'll see.
> 
> “Yes, I lied. I just wanted to surprise you, ok? Perdóname la vida.” - Excuse me.
> 
> “Pero que cosa más adorable… Miralos, son tan tiernos. Quiero llenarlos de besos. How could the owners just surrender them like that? ¡No lo entiendo!” - Such adorable things! Look at them, they are so cute. I want to kiss them all over. How could the owners just surrender them like that? I don't understand.
> 
> “Pobrecitos… their house did burn down though.”
> 
> “No problem. Te mereces el mundo entero.” Eddie picked up Laika and kissed her snout. -No problem, You deserve the world
> 
> “Entonces, ¿que piensas, querida Laika? ¿Quieres venir a casa con nosotros?” - So, what do you think dear Laika? Do you wanna come home with us?
> 
> “Gracias, amor, gracias por los besos.” - Thanks, love, thank you for the kisses.
> 
> “Si, lo sé.” - Yes, I know
> 
> “I know. Tu corazón va a sanar. Y me encantaría poder hacerte feliz de alguna manera.” - You heart will heal. I'd love to be able to somehow make you happy.


	3. Heroes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “I tore my shirt and it was all your fault, little screaming angel. Were you having too much fun with these ones?” Buck put the little girl down on a blanket that was on the grass and sat down next to her noticing Chris was making his way to him. “She had a swarm of puppies on her and she screamed out of pure joy. I may have over-reacted.” He looked guilty and stared at Eddie, pouting. “Also, tore my shirt.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Buck and puppies and babies, am I right?

Since he told Christopher about Laika, taking him to meet the puppy was all Eddie could think about. The image of Chris and Buck interacting with puppies was invading his thoughts. When Sunday came, he knew they had a bit of a ride ahead but just thinking about having them both by his side, having fun and playing games helped ease Eddie’s mind. Buck had been better this past week, chirpier and looking less sad, joking around again, like he used to. Maybe he was getting better.

Eddie and Buck had had a serious conversation with Christopher about the puppies and how to behave around them. Christopher was beyond excited and Eddie was a bit worried. Eddie explained step by step what was going to happen and let Chris know that if at any point he felt uncomfortable he could just say so.

Of course, the moment they arrived at Paige’s every plan they made went straight to hell. It seemed like a little girl was screaming or crying at the top of her lungs. The commotion seemed to come from the backyard. Buck was the first to sprint to the gate with Chris and Eddie following behind. Buck acted on instinct and jumped the gate tearing his shirt with a loose wooden board. Abruptly, Buck’s laughter resonated in Eddie’s ears, so he peeked his head over the gate standing on his tippy toes hanging on the fence and holding on to Chris’s shoulder. Paige was coming to open the gate and Buck had a giggling little girl in his arms with four puppies jumping up his legs.

“Hey, Eddie!” Paige greeted him with a smile.

“We thought…”

“Oh, the screaming, yeah, that was my daughter, Eli. Sorry, she gets super excited when she visits.”

“Come on in, please.” She squatted to be at Christopher’s level. “Hey, Christopher, right? I have someone who really wants to meet you.”

“Hi.” He answered timidly.

Paige pointed at Bucks’ legs and the set of puppies jumping up and down. “There’s Laika, waiting to meet you, buddy. Go ahead.” Eddie smiled at her and started walking to the playpen.

“Come on, Chris. Inside.” He took the braces and passed them to Buck, then grabbed his son under his arms, picked him up and put him in the playpen.

Excited and a little bit out of it, Buck was bent down on the grass, still holding on to the girl who was now calmer even though the puppies were trying their best to lick her toes.

“I tore my shirt and it was all your fault, little screaming angel. Were you having too much fun with these ones?” Buck put the little girl down on a blanket that was on the grass and sat down next to her noticing Chris was making his way to him. “She had a swarm of puppies on her and she screamed out of pure joy. I may have over-reacted.” He looked guilty and stared at Eddie, pouting. “Also, tore my shirt.”

“Yeah, no te preocupes, it’s almost unnoticeable.”

Eddie stood by the side with Paige while Buck helped Chris sit next to him and grabbed a squeaky toy making it sound a few times. That caught the attention of Balto and Toto. He threw the toy and watched as the two puppies ran away and started playing with each other. Huan and Laika were still playing with Eli.

“Hey, Chris, that one is Laika with the yellow collar.” Buck called Laika who just looked at him and plopped on the blanket.

“She’s really lazy, Bucky.”

“Yes, looks like it. She must be a good match.” He smirked at the little boy.

“I’m not lazy at all, Buck.”

“I know, I know. I was talking about your dad, buddy.” He whispered on Chris ear, looked up and met Eddie’s eyes. Chris started giggling and Laika stood up and walked to him.

“Hey, good girl, this is Chris.” Buck patted the puppy’s head.

Eddie was entranced, he knew Paige was trying to explain to him the whole procedure that involved training a service dog and she was being very helpful and patient about it, but his mind kept wondering away, taking him on a realization journey. Watching Chris and Buck play with the puppies, how Buck seemed to be in perfect control of the situation, helping Chris just enough to let him be independent, but understanding that if he needed help, he had Buck right there beside him. Buck was being as much of a father to Christopher as he was, and the realization was overwhelming. He knew Buck loved Chris, never doubted it, even during the lawsuit when he disappeared for a while, he never considered the love was gone, Buck would always go back to him. To Chris. It was a terrifying thought to have on a quiet Sunday morning. He tried to pay attention to Paige again, but his brain was having none of it.

He realized some time later, and he couldn’t tell exactly how long, that Paige was gone, nowhere to be seen, but Buck, Chris and Eli were still in the playpen with the puppies. He heard a door opening and closing and turned around following the noise.

“Hey, guys, anyone wants some lemonade or maybe a soda?” Paige had a few plastic cups in one hand and a lemonade pitcher in the other. Eddie rushed to her side to help her. She looked at him, handing him the pitcher and whispered, “I noticed you weren’t paying much attention to me, so I left you to your musings.”

“Sorry, my mind was just… overthinking, I guess.” He glanced at Buck.

“It’s ok, it can get to be a lot. But I have everything in writing, I’ll just email you. So, the only thing I need you to know right now, and really listen to me, is that you’ll need to be ready to come get her in two weeks, and then take her to her trainer a few times a week, and the more times Chris gets to tag along, the better.”

“Yes, yes, that much I got. I’m so sorry, it’s just… they’re distracting.”

“Yeah, _they _are.” She chuckled. They left the pitcher and the glasses on the table and approached the playpen.

Buck was laying on the grass, belly up, howling with laughter with Eli sitting between his legs and Chris sitting beside him, Laika trying her best to cover every inch of the boy’s face with kisses and Huan was doing the same with Buck. He could see the happiness radiating out of Buck, it made him feel at peace at last, and an idea crept up on him.

“Dios ¿Que hice yo para merecer esto?”, Eddie threw his arms in the air, grabbed his head with both hands and walked the other way, facing Paige. “I think… I think we’re going to take Huan too.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay, this chapter got rewritten a few times bc I couldn't channel my inner fluffer. but here it is. short but sweet.
> 
> Translation time!  
1\. “Yeah, no te preocupes." - Don't worry  
2\. “Dios ¿Que hice yo para merecer esto?” - God, what did I do to deserve this?


	4. Verte reír

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There was nothing in the world that compared to Evan Buckley's smile. Well, maybe Eddie could consider his son's smile to be a serious competitor for the smile that was gracing his best friend’s face. But right at that second, Buck won all the prices.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's been 84 years...  
Ok, but I'm here now. Enjoy!

There was nothing in the world that compared to Evan Buckley's smile. Well, maybe Eddie could consider his son's smile to be a serious competitor for the smile that was gracing his best friend’s face. But right at that second, Buck won all the prices. 

When he arrived at Eddie’s under false pretenses and Christopher yelled at him a heartfelt “Surprise!” his face lit up like a Christmas tree. 

And at that moment Eddie realized he couldn’t go on like this.

“When did you… how did you… no, ok, but when did you? How long, Eds?” Buck was squinting at Eddie, beaming that beautiful smile of his, knowing Eddie had pulled off this one great thing just because of him. For him.

“It was a done deal during our visit a month ago. I’ve had him two weeks here already. Trying to hide it from you was… difficult.” Eddie smiled and looked down. “Chris wanted to tell you right away and I just wanted it to be…” He put a hand on Buck’s shoulder and took a step forward, looking int Bucks' eyes, “perfect for you.” His hand felt warm and his heart was beating a little too fast. “Because I know you considered it and rejected the idea, but, look, I get it, life has been doing you wrong for forever and I most definitely have been doing you wrong... and I just…” Eddie noticed Buck was tensing up and he took a deep breath, “wanted you to have something good. One thing to hold on to.” He squeezed Buck’s shoulder and let his hand fall grazing Buck’s arm. “Sólo quería darte lo que te mereces.”

“I don’t know what to say.” Tears were gathering up in his eyes.

“You don’t have to say anything. If it’s too much, just let me know. We have room for him here, you don’t have to take him right away either. We can work it out. I just needed you to have this. A possibility.” His statement was honest and full of love. Eddie didn’t know how to deal well with feelings but he knew that he loved Buck and he would show him however he could even if he still couldn’t get the words out. He was never one to use his words. So he’d have to show Buck instead. “Ok, now to the fun part, these two need a bath. Perritos mugrientos.”

The backyard was all set up to give the puppies a much-needed bath, they were covered in mud, and Paige had told him that they were allowed to get a bath. And now was the time.

Eddie had made sure that Chris was wearing some old clothes that he could make a mess in. And taking one look at Buck he noticed he wasn’t wearing appropriate clothes.

“Hey, Buck, I’m going to get you a change of clothes, ok?”

“No need, man, I can just wash these when I go back home, really, don’t worry.”

“Solo déjame, sí?” Eddie walked towards the house.

It took him two minutes to come back out and the laughter that filled his ears made him rush through the door. Chris and Buck were standing in the middle of the playpen with the hose that Eddie had prepared and a bucket filled with water, Huan and Laika were jumping up and down, getting mud all over the boys. The huge plastic basin, forgotten to the side.

“Wait, Buck…” Eddie tried, but it was too late. Buck was already kneeling, holding on to Chris, his jeans caked with mud. Eddie sighed and turned around, muttering to himself, “no puedo creer que estoy enamorado de él.”

“Hey!” Buck beamed at him. “I told you, Eddie, it’s ok.” And that smile. Eddie could surrender his whole life to that smile.

The mess was out of control for a bit. It looked like all of the dirt and mud and grass went from the puppies’ fur to Buck and Chris’ clothes, hair, and skin. Eddie disappeared back inside. He stood in the kitchen, looking out the window, pushing his forehead against the window. The coldness of the glass helped settle his erratic heart. 

He could feel his doubtful heart untangling, every fiber of his being confirmed that this was it. _ It _. There was no more doubt. The decision was made and he wasn’t going to back out of it. He couldn’t go on like this. The words needed to get out or he was going to lose his mind.

\---

Two clean puppies and a good hose-down for Buck and Chris later, Eddie was covering them with warm towels. The sun was starting to set and there was a crispiness in the air that was starting to feel uncomfortable. 

Buck grabbed Huan and dried his paws. Eddie opened the door and Buck took a step forward and left the puppy on the kitchen floor, while Chris called at Laika, who trotted her way to the boy.

“Sit, Laika.” Eddie looked down at his son who was trying to remain serious giving the puppy the command. “Good girl. Now let daddy dry your paws.”

Eddie crouched and grabbed Laika from the floor. “So… Homemade pizza?” Eddie asked, stepping inside the kitchen.

“Ok, but I need to change, and Chris…” Buck picked Chris up and pretended to sniff him, “needs a shower.” Chris was giggling and Eddie’s heart was about to explode.

“Of course, I’m not letting you two cook covered in that.” Eddie gestured all around Buck and Chris. “Also…” He stepped closer and mirrored Buck’s action, pretending to sniff both of them. “You should shower too, you know?”

“Nah, just changing is ok, I’m gonna end up covered in flour anyway knowing this little man and, well, knowing me, so maybe I’ll shower after.”

“Daddy!” Chris extended his arms towards Eddie and pouted, “I’m cold.”

“Yes, you’re all wet, claro que tienes frío, mijo." Come on, let’s get you into the shower.” He grabbed his son from Bucks’ arms. The simple motion felt so blissfully domestic. It was a maneuver they’ve done hundreds of times before, just transferring Chris from Bucks’ arms to his, but suddenly Eddie felt overwhelmed.

He started towards the bathroom. He didn’t know if he’d be even able to get some words out, so he coughed and tried, “Clothes on my bed, and you know where everything else is, we’ll be out in five.”

\---

The countertop had an arrangement of ingredients on top of it and Buck was opening cabinets left and right when Eddie walked in with Chris in tow. 

“Do you remember what we need, Chris?” Buck asked while propping him up on his chair.

“I guess… flour?” Chis beamed at Buck. Eddie was going to melt. He would not resist this exchange. It was too much.

“Yes, but come on, that’s an easy one. Try harder.” Buck kept at it with the cabinets.

“Yeast! To make it all fluffy.”

“Good one, buddy. What else?” Buck grabbed the salt from the cabinet and showed Chris.

“Salt? To make it salty!”

“Don’t forget the sugar, to let the yeast grow. And last…” Buck started.

Eddie rolled his eyes and continued, “olive oil, because everything is better with olive oil.”

“You know it, man. And warm water, and we’re done. This is called mise en place, and it will make you a great chef, Superman. So you can have everything you need ready for when you need it.” Chris was looking at Buck with a seriousness that made Eddie chuckle.

“What, dad?"

"Nothing, chef Diaz. I'm just watching you two do your job."

"Can I mix the ingredients, Buck? I remember from last time!” Chris cheered.

“Yes, of course, I’m just your sous chef today, Chef Diaz. Are we doing bowl or countertop today, chef?”

Chris giggled, grabbed the bowl, and poured the flour inside, “I just - just showered and- yeah, the bowl is less messy.”

“You’re raising him right, Eddie. A bit boring,” Buck teased, tickling Chris’ sides, “but right.”

“Hmm?” Eddie was out of it, this whole day and the domesticity of it all was breaking his walls little by little. He was sitting on the floor, with both Laika and Huan collapsed against his legs.

“Distracted?”

“I was just, yeah… thinking. I need to feed these two and put them in the crate before you start. Try not to make a mess, please.” Eddie kneeled and opened the cabinet where the dog food was. Laika and Huan perked up at the sound of pebbles hitting their food bowls.

“Daddy, I just said I’m not doing countertop...” Chris huffed, exasperated.

“Ok, ok. Come on, guys, we’re not wanted here.” He took the two bowls and disappeared into the living room with the puppies. Eddie could feel Buck's gaze on the nape of his neck.

“Buck? Now I need to make a hole in the middle, right?”

“Mhmm.” Buck was still staring at the door where Eddie disappeared a minute ago.

“The yeast! I forgot to do the yeast.” Chris looked up and stared at Buck. “Bucky, you’re not paying attention to me.”

“It’s already been sprinkled over the water, buddy, I’ve got you.” Buck reached for the water and yeast mix without paying attention to what he was doing and he felt a warm hand instead of a glass bowl. He looked up and found Eddie holding the bowl and his own hand holding Eddie’s. When he looked at Eddie, his cheeks were pink and a lopsided smile was creeping upon his face. 

“You’re always wanted, Eds.” Buck winked at him, his pinky gracing the back of Eddie’s hand. And Eddie was thrown for a loop. He considered that maybe Buck had made the same decision as he had, that this was it. Tonight was it. That maybe Buck can’t go on like this either. Maybe Buck knew too. And all the longing and the pining was unnecessary because they were both on the same page. And maybe they both felt the same. The way his hand felt like it was on fire where Buck’s pinky, _ his pinky, _touched him. His thoughts were interrupted when Chris spoke.

“Oh, so… we check if it’s foamy!” Chris patted on Buck’s shoulder. “Is it foamy? I can’t see!”

“It’s very foamy, yes. Very active yeast.” Eddie showed his son the mixture.

“Ok, buddy, now the flour forms a crown and in the middle we pour our oil. And we sprinkle the salt all around.” Chris was following along with the instructions, even doing them before Buck told him too.

“I told you, Bucky… I remember!” Chris glared at his father. “It’s daddy the one that can’t cook!”

“I’m not doing anything right now, why are you glaring at me?” Chris scoffed and turned his attention to the dough.

“And now the water, Bucky.”

Buck poured the water in the middle of the bowl and was about to start mixing everything with a spoon when he heard Chris shout. “No, Buck, let me! I want to do this part, then you can do the rest with your hands.” He gave the boy the wooden spoon and Chris started to mix from the center of the bowl. “Great job, Chris. I need to wash my hands, Eddie, help him?”

“Yes, please, I can help with a wooden spoon and some mixing,” Eddie informed them.

“I’m really not so sure, Eds.”

“Shut up.”

Buck looked at the dough mix that Eddie and Chris were putting together and smiled. “Ok, Chef Diaz, it’s kneading time, move over, and let your sous chef do the hard work.”

\---

While they left the dough to leaven and Buck made a quick sauce with a few things he found in the pantry, Chris asked permission to go play in his room and left Buck and Eddie alone.

Two beers in hand, Eddie signaled Buck to go sit on the couch. He took the puppies out of the crate, and left Huan on Buck’s lap.

Laika was left on the floor and she just flopped then and there. Eddie chuckled. “What a lazy girl.” He sat beside Buck, leaving enough room between them that they weren’t touching, but barely. “It’s like an hour for the dough to rise, right?”

“You see? You do pay attention.” Buck winked at him and Eddie felt his cheeks go hot all over again.

“We’ve made pizza before, Buck, I remember some things.” Eddie took a sip of his beer. “Listen-” 

“Lego time, Bucky!” Christopher yelled from his room.

“Hey, no yelling, Chris,” Eddie answered. “I guess I’m on mozzarella and toppings duty again, huh?”

“And I’m on lego duty, it seems.” Buck stood up, grabbed Huan from the couch, and took three steps before halting abruptly. “Eddie.”

Eddie raised a hand and smiled at him, “Later,” gesturing for him to go. “It’s ok. Tenemos tiempo. ”

\---

The assembly of the pizzas was a challenge, but after an hour and a half of chain work and a serious discussion over which was the best topping, they managed to get the three personalized pizzas ready to eat.

Eddie settled with Chris on the couch, helping him choose a movie to watch.

Buck walked in with two pizzas, placing them on the table. “I call dibs on Chris’ leftovers.” 

“I’m not leaving anything, Bucky. And you’ll starve.” Chris cackled.

“Ouch, that’s mean, kid.”

“Here, Eddie, this is yours, the abhorrent pizza with pineapple.” Buck shivered. “And for the Chef," He made a reverence, "here’s yours.” He turned around and went looking for his own.

They ate in silence, watching whatever movie Chris had picked. Eddie couldn’t pay attention. At all. His whole body was vibrating with anxiety. He was almost convinced he hadn’t misinterpreted everything, but still. He was nervous and he was buzzing. Buck was munching away at his pizza, without a care in the world. And Eddie knew there wasn’t a need for him to be so damn constrained about this. It was just Buck. And he was just going to be stating facts. Though the fact that what he needed to state was that he was completely and irrevocably in love with his best friend was a little bit overpowering and made his brain go on and on about it.

The movie finished and he was still stuck glaring at Buck.

“Hey, everything ok?” Buck noticed something was wrong with Eddie. Buck always noticed. He was so aware of him. And Eddie was… a mess.

“Yeah, yeah. I should put Chris to sleep, though.”

“Let me.” Buck touched Chris’ cheeks softly and picked him up. “Chris, time for bed, kid.”

\---

Putting Chris to bed had played a very dangerous game with Eddie’s patience. Stopping himself from just telling Buck right then and there how he felt took every ounce of strength he had. So when they walked out of the room into the living room, Eddie felt like he was one step away from collapsing in on himself. “So…”

“So…” Buck was staring at him, a soft smile on his lips, and he didn’t seem confused or scared and that gave Eddie the final push to be brave, Buck deserved all his braveness.

“Sit down.”

“Ok… Bossy.” Buck sat down, grabbed a pillow from the couch and put it on his lap, hugging it.

“Ok, yeah. All cards on the table.” Eddie was pacing in front of Buck. “I think I’m… look, I’m going to say something and-” he stopped and sighed. “It doesn’t have to… we don’t have to make it a thing, ok? But I just-” his hands were shaking, actually shaking. “Today was- it felt so good. It was a perfect day, Buck, for me, I mean.”

“Eddie.”

“It really was… so domestic, and I-”

“Eds, I-”

“No, let me just say this, ok? Because I’m not good-”

“You’re-”

“Quit interrupting me, please?”

“Ok.”

“I’m not good with words. I know this, you know this, even Christopher knows this. But we’ve been having this…” he gestured between them with his hand, “this thing, right? And I’m tired of feeling like I’m walking on eggshells and my heart is about to explode all the freaking time. Like I’m constantly one word vomit away from complete buffoonery. On calls, during dinner, while playing games, drinking beer, sitting on a couch, in the gym. Making pizza. When your pinky grazes the back of my hand.” Eddie groaned and covered his face with his hands. “It’s ridiculous and it’s enough. So, there.” And this was it. This was what he was building up and up and up to since who knows when. “I’m in love with you.”

Buck chuckled. “So… you’re not good with words, huh? Because that was… something else, let me tell you.”

“Buck.” Eddie was pleading. He needed his best friend to have mercy on his soul right now.

“I like that thing you said? That you feel like your heart is about to explode? That was nice.”

“Shut up.”

Buck pushed the pillow to the side. “And I’m going to need a list.”

“A list?”

“Yes, a list.”

“Of?”

Buck surged forward. “The amount of times you were about to, very romantically put, let me say,  _ word vomit  _ your love for me on calls.” 

A peck on Eddie's cheek. 

“And during dinner.” Another peck on his other cheek. 

“And while playing games and drinking beer.” A hand on his waist. 

“Sitting on a couch?” A hand on the nape of his neck. 

“And making pizza.” His nose was rubbing Eddie’s nose.  “And the best of it all, my pinky grazing the back of your hand.”

A kiss. A kiss that felt like coming home. Like those lips where were Eddie belonged all along.

“And what was that last thing?” Buck whispered against Eddie’s mouth. “Oh, yeah, I’m in love with you too.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> “Sólo quería darte lo que te mereces.” - "I only wanted to give you what you deserve.  
"Perritos mugrientos" - Filthy doggies.  
“No puedo creer que estoy enamorado de él.” - I can't believe I'm in love with him.  
"Claro que tienes frío, mijo." - Of course you're cold, son.  
“It’s ok. Tenemos tiempo. ” - We've got time.
> 
> And if Buck heard him any of the times Eddie professed his love in spanish, we will never know.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm so sorry. This is ridiculous.
> 
> Translation time!  
1\. ¿Como puedes hacer esto? ¿Acaso no piensas Evan? You don’t… you don’t think. You just do. ¡No puedes no contestar la radio!   
1\. How could you do this? Do you even think? You don’t… you don’t think. You just do. You can’t not answer the radio!
> 
> 2\. “Esta es la cuarta vez…” He trailed off, “¿Sabes qué? I don’t care.   
2\. This is the fourth time… You know what? I don’t care.
> 
> 3\. “Ay, Buck, eres un idiota” – Oh Buck, you’re an idiot.  
4\. “Ojalá fueras mi idiota” – I wish you were my idiot.


End file.
